Here Are 5 Fixes If You Broke Your New Year’s Resolution

“New Year, new you!” “Now’s your chance to change everything about yourself you don’t like!” “Yes, it’s possible to make massive, sweeping changes in the next 30 days that will definitely stick!” 

…and other lies we hear about New Year’s Resolutions.

Catalyst changes are great. And when’s a better time to do one than in a brand-new year? It feels like the time for a fresh start and gives us a chance to reflect on what worked well for us last year — and what didn’t. 

When approached from a healthy perspective, January is an amazing time to create new habits and routines that will set us up for success. But the truth is, most of us view this as our one shot to get it “right” — so when we inevitably fall off the proverbial horse and break our New Year’s resolutions, we feel like we have to wait another 11 months to get back on track. And that feels really, really depressing.

Here’s the good news: Falling off the horse is not only normal and ok but actually welcome. Why is this? We’ll dive into that here soon. But in the meantime, let’s explore six New Year’s resolution fixes for those who want to keep going strong after falling off that horse. 

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Why resolutions fail

Throughout the year, many of us go about our daily routines with very little analysis of whether or not they’re actually working well for us. Our routines feel good enough, and every few months, we might think, “I should do something different. Something better. I should improve these habits and routines.” But the thought often goes in and out of our consciousness, and we return to what we always do.

Then suddenly, the holiday season arrives and we forgo our routines. For many of us, our schedules shift significantly: We go to more gatherings, we travel more frequently, and school is out of session. During these two weeks when there is no routine, the pressures of hosting and present-buying start to overwhelm us, there’s a lot of time to think, drink, and overindulge. And feel emotions that knock us off our feet. We declare right then and there that we are going to change everything come January 1st. 

But the holiday cheer subsides, and the normal routine returns. We’re immediately back to waking up at 7 am, rushing out the door for school dropoff and work, and coming home to the same old days. Here’s the reality: Nothing actually changed in our lives other than a declaration that it would, and the calendar switching to a new last digit. We didn’t set up systems or habits to support our new goals. So, what do we do? 

1. Focus on your mindset and internal cues.

Believe it or not, the best time to interrupt your mindset is while you’re in your normal routine. And this is crucial: Don’t wait for the perfect time to make a change. Only 19% of resolution-makers keep their resolutions because the system is designed to fail. When we’re out of our routine and everyone around us is redesigning their lives and making resolutions that’s actually not the best time to make our resolutions. We need to base these changes on internal factors and motivations, not because it’s what everyone else is doing.  

The first step to making lasting change is to focus on your mindset and your internal reasons for wanting change. You likely know in your heart of hearts which one change would make you happier and more fulfilled. And you know that if you make that change, you’ll be a little bit kinder, a little happier, and have a lot more ease. When you focus on why you want to make a change, you’re far more likely to keep the motivation and follow through. But it has to come from the inside.

2. Determine your biggest pain point and set up a system.

Once you’re clear on why you want to make this change, instead of focusing on the 17 biggest “priorities” to make it happen, pick your one or two biggest pain points, and put plans in place to change only those things. 

Maybe your cluttered home is increasing your anxiety and contributing to daily fights. (For example: “Mom! Where are my glasses?” and, “Honey! Where did you put that very important piece of mail?”) These little frictions may just be dragging you down. Commit to methodically decluttering your home and setting up systems that serve you and your family.

Or perhaps you feel tired — like all-the-time tired. Commit to getting to bed earlier, setting your alarm so you have time for some movement in the morning, and meal prepping so you can fill your plate with more nutrient-dense food for natural energy. 

We all have unique pain points that, if fixed, would make a huge impact on our lives. Pick only those to focus on this year. There’s always next year to fix the rest.

Read next: Here’s Why You Feel Sluggish During Winter (and 5 Ways to Fix It)

3. Play the long game.

Any program or book that promises you a complete life change in 30 days is, well, lying. Yes, it’s possible to see incredible changes in your life by simply shifting your mindset. But real, lasting change takes time. Play the long game.

Commit to switching habits that will eliminate your pain points over the entire year. In January, the thought of taking 12 months to achieve one or two goals might feel incredibly daunting. But come December 31st, looking back and saying “I finally did it!” is super satisfying. Don’t lose sight of the big picture.

4. Celebrate every little win.

So how do we sustain these changes that might take the whole year? Celebrate any and every little win. You went to bed at 10 instead of midnight three nights this week? Way to go! Time to book that massage. Don’t focus on the four nights that didn’t go as planned, and instead celebrate the three that did. Remember, we can’t hate and punish ourselves for the person we want to be. We have to love ourselves for that person.

New Year’s Resolutions indeed fail. But you don’t have to. When you approach them with the right mindset, identify what pain points that — when eliminated — would really move the needle for you, commit to the long game, and pat yourself on the back every chance you get, you’ll not only surprise yourself next January 1st, but also you’ll realize that you sure had fun along the way.

5. You won’t master your goal on the first day.

Of course, the more you stick to your goal and plan, the quicker you’ll learn to do something out of habit. For instance, if you want to sleep by 9 every night, it’s important to keep that routine. But let’s be honest, how many times do we stop our resolutions because of one bad day, or even one bad week?

One of the best New Year’s resolution fixes is by walking in knowing you’ll stumble. You’ll be less likely to forgo your goal altogether if you’re willing to let the bad days slide by and get back in gear the following day. Didn’t make it to the gym today? That’s okay. Give your body a break and make a plan to return tomorrow or the next day and stick to it.

Read next:  Practicing Intuitive Eating Is a Great New Year’s Resolution. Here’s Why

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